Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Dear Wichita,

Dear Wichita Drivers,

Please do not drag race your car at 2 am and 3 am on Kellogg in front of my apartment.  While am I sure your car is very cool and manly, being woken up by the roar of your engine is ridiculous.  Not to mention that drag racing on a busy road at night is dangerous.

Sleepless in Wichita

Dear Office Manager,

Can you please do your job.  One of our two elevators has been broken for months now, and the other one constantly breaks down, bounces, and rarely comes to the floor when you push the button.  According to the elevator repair man, it is beyond fixing.  I know I need more exercise, but walking up to the 11th floor is not what I had in mind.  And now that Summer has reared her ugly head, it is so hot in our office that you can't think strait.  Please fix these issues or you can kiss your rent check goodbye.

Hot Under the Collar

Dear Union Protesters,

What are you protesting?  I see you at every major construction project with a "Shame on You" sign.  Are you protesting economic development in a downtown that desperately needs it?  Are you protesting a project is employing hundreds of people?  I don't get it.

Downtown Neighbor

Dear State Building Patrons,

I understand you are down on your luck, and coming to receive you government assistance, but can you please put some clothes on when you do it?  Walking in to work, I don't need to see you in your pajamas, I put clothes on to go out in public, you should too.  And now that it is hot outside, can you cover up a little?  A little left to the imagination would be nice.

Person with Eyes

Dear Downtown Grocery Store,

Why is it always a train wreck when I go to the grocery store near downtown?  There are always a million screaming kids running around, people always look lost, it takes forever to check out.  Forget "People of Walmart" I am starting a "People of Dillon's."  I really don't want to start driving farther to a better grocery store, but I can't take it anymore.

Hungry, Hungry Hippo